And if we go to Mexico

I have now decided that there are plenty of reasons to be excessively happy with life. My blog however is not one of them. It has taken me about 4 weeks to finally secure myself to a seat to compose exactly what I have been up for roughly the past two months. This is going to be followed by a communication barrage on my part, so expect contact from me at some point soon. Having said this, my communication backlog is so long I’m sure if it were a wall, it would be viewable from the moon or something. Essentially it’s very large, and I just don’t think I’m ever going to be in a position to clear it, perhaps ever. However if your reading this then please be assured my inability to communicate with you is not because I hate you, but because I’m rubbish at communication.

Anyhow, onto other stuff. I honestly think that I would be able to give over one hundred pros and cons of being in LA in the past two months, but that could be a little dull for you. If this is the case, then you can just look at the pictures;

Mexico Spring Break Pics;
http://picasaweb.google.com/david.ling/MexicoSpringBreak07?pli=1

Mini San Francisco Road trip Pics;
http://picasaweb.google.com/david.ling/MiniRoadTripTowardsSanFransiscoApril07

However, in order to even slightly understand these images you will have to read the rest of the blog, so now, if you have reached this far, you’re in for the long haul.

The Oscars
it feels like FOREVER ago now, but I did indeed have the joys of going along to the Oscars about one day before the actual ceremony. It was actually pretty exciting. Whereas in Britain such an event would lead to half of London being closed off, with very little chance of getting anywhere close to seeing what was going on, the staff at the Oscars seemed only too keen to let us go up close to see everything. We even got a chance to walk down the red carpet, which was suggested by a staff member. The carpet was covered in plastic, but, (as the attendant dizzily explained) we could actually TOUCH the carpet through the holes which had been ripped in the red carpet by eager fans. I also got to smile next to an Oscar, and hug the big ones a lot as well. If you have not had a chance to see the images you can see them here http://picasaweb.google.com/david.ling/TheLeadUpToTheOscars

I actually watched the Oscars this year for the first time ever this year, which I think will have to be a substitute for Eurovision seeing as I’m In America, and why would America be interested in watching some Irish man complain a lot about rubbish songs across the other side of the world? THERE IS A WAR ON YOU KNOW! Anyhow, I digress, and essentially, for the first time in my life I knew all the films they were talking about, and had seen a fair few of them. By diffusion, living in the movie capital of the world has had an effect on me. (If you are interested in my thoughts, Happy Feet is a genuinely appalling movie, whereas winner of Best Foreign film “The Lives of Others” is perhaps the best film I have ever seen, and I strongly advise anyone reading this to go and see it/rent it immediately. This is not just because I am dating a German, and the film itself is from Germany. You can watch the trailer here if you want, but it’s not all that great; http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony/thelivesofothers/medium.html)

Anyhow, I realized that, being able to go to the Oscars, and then to be able to get a bus home makes me an incredibly lucky person. This, combined with the fact that it was a lot of fun to walk down the red carpet, and know all the films merits this experience AMAZING!

Internship
Without going into too much detail, American University classes have been of difficulty for me. This has been for a myriad of reasons;

· The American system of classes means that you have three ‘quarters’ of eleven weeks each. Each quarter, one picks 12 units. As the average class is four units, you generally take three classes. This is, in a way good because it means you can pick and choose literally WHATEVER classes you want anywhere, but also a bit annoying sometimes because things can feel a bit rushed. Like a selection box, when really all you wanted was a bar of Dairy Milk…. Perhaps.

· Each of these classes gives you an INSANE amount of work to do. The average literature based class would have one full novel to read a week, as well as weekly tests (see below), and then a midterm at the end of week five (a 90 minute test), and then a final exam and/or essay (essays longer than the UK ones). As a result classes become less about the content, and more of an endurance test as to if you can stay awake/sane for the full eleven week period. Add to this the fact that you’re only in America for a year and want to go and see some of it, and you can see the problem. (As demonstration of the endurance test mentality, the final week of each quarter, when everyone has a shed load of exams/essays to do the University opens up all available space on a 24 hour basis for people to work in, and then offers free coffee, and massages until midnight, in the vein attempt of keeping students awake to study EVEN MORE.

· As part of the endurance challenge game, I pulled my first (and hopefully last) ever ‘all nighter’. I went into the library at 9pm, and didn’t leave until 7am the next morning. There was a very scary moment at 5am, when I thought all my work had been lost. It wasn’t.

· Next up and I think I will have to practice a degree of diplomacy here; lectures in America are, less academically stimulating than those in Britain. In a sense it feels like I’m back in year 13 completing my A levels, or, in some cases, even year 11 completing my GCSE’S. Example of this is, just before Spring break I went back to the infamous ‘bar graphs’ of Microsoft Excel. A sense of dread came over me, especially because I never thought I would ever have to return to the dreaded bar charts again. (As a side note, what on EARTH is the point of a doughnut graph???)

· One of my lectures last quarter was pretty difficult. In America, lectures are pretty much at the mercy of what the lecturer thinks. There is very little capacity for analytical thinking, as one may expect from a degree, and instead there is a heavy focus on WHAT the content is, and this content is filtered by the lecturer. This is generally fine, as student views fit those of the lecturer, however it can become very frustrating if you do not agree with what your lecturer says. This all became a problem last quarter. I was taking a class which I thought would focus on the ways advertisers make you buy products, which is excellent, because I like adverts, and think that generally they are a good thing. Say what you like against Coca Cola, but they can make a good advert etc etc. It was with sadness that I learned to discover therefore, that our lecturer was all but a communist on a political mission. Instead of focusing on the joys of the advertising world, I was treated to, amongst other things, a suggested no media day (where I would not have any contact with the media at all, and apparently rediscover friendship), contacting the government to redeploy the airwaves for the nation, suggested independent local stations set up by the public (which if anyone has ever seen local TV will know is a terrible idea), and, for some bizarre reason, a lecture of Americas reliance on foreign oil. The final straw came in our revision notes which suggested that mass media “robs you and society as a whole of its most vital resource: the cognitive power of the individual” –The main problem being that I LIKE ADVERTS AND MASS MEDIA!!!

· Due to the way my degree works, the grades from this year mean nothing, which, in some ways is a good thing, but is sort of demotivating

ANYWAY, the main point of this piece was that, for this new and final quarter, I wanted to try out something new, which is why I wanted to apply for an internship, essentially work experience for ten weeks. Now, the way it works in Hollywood apparently, is it’s not WHAT you know, it’s WHO you know. This means that many people looking to get into the entertainment industry will be willing to do near anything to get a foot in the door of the industry. As it happens I thought it would be pretty cool to work in the entertainment industry, what with being near Hollywood and the like. I learned very quickly however, that many people are in the market to exploit free labor, and so I had to attempt to avoid these types. There is an AMAZING story to be told about one potential employer, but I’m afraid I cannot write about it until I’m out of Los Angeles, because I’m genuinely scared of repercussions from the people involved upon reading my blog. All Ill say it involved being called Brother David, a man roughly sixty at the head of the company/cult, and a very young ex intern who enjoyed hugging him. There was also a company who had their head quarters as a Starbucks, because they didn’t have an office. So there we go. (Essentially I wanted an Internship whereby I would just serve Justin Timberlake Cheesecake, or perhaps operate a deli in Beverly Hills)

Anyhow, I got an Internship, which is amazing, and I’m glad I have it. I will write more about what involves, but chronologically at least it’s important to talk about Spring Break first, as well as the loss of Gen!

The Loss of Gen
essentially one of the finest Australians to grace Californians fine shores, departed them just before Spring Break. Gen was a good friend, from Australia, who went home. MISS YOU GEN!!! Before she left, we spent many an hour finding excellent youtube videos. The following are a testimony to Gen;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xinHLPdt98g – Beverly French of ITV Play performing Flash dance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LJ-3qkSoVKA – Directors commentary on the Mint

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FA621_F3bKw – Paris Hilton runs out of Gas

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnLtsoWFZsQ – Quite possibly the funniest thing anywhere EVER.

Miss you Gen!

My first (and last) ever Spring Break!!!
Okay, I can prattle through this section, as; up to this point I think the whole blog has been a little dense. Before I start, a little background on the infamous ‘Spring Break’

· Whereas a UK student would get 4 weeks Easter Holiday, the American student gets one, before the intense classes start up again for another 11 weeks.

· As a result Spring break is generally about going somewhere with a beach, and drinking A LOT.

· As the drinking age in America in 21, generally people flood in Mexico as A) The drinking age there is 18 and B) The weather is generally nicer.

· Perhaps like a holiday to Ibiza therefore, the theme is drink and party by night, sleep during the day.

Now, not wanting to be a total party pooper, yet also wanting to shove a bit of culture into my week off, I compromised with my fellow travel companions (the delectable Isabella Nolte, and German Steffen Felix), to have three nights in Mexico city, and then five nights in Acapulco. Here is the good, bad and other of the trip;

1. The bus to the airport – as is always the way, mad people ride the buses in LA, all the time. Today was not different, and we got into a fight with someone claiming we were sitting in the wrong area of the bus. He said we didn’t know because “we were not from round here”. To annoy him Steffen and Issa spoke in German about him. When he asked what they were saying Issa responded coyly “Oh. We were speaking German”. Net result, he kicked their luggage as he left. STRESSFUL!

2. At the airport, the people responded as if they had never handled an international traveler in their lives. We waited for about 30 minutes, with the warning that we would have to be ‘specially screened’ ANNOYING

3. To be specially screened meant that we were bought into a special holding area at the security check. Or at least we would have been if there had been only two of us. As there were three, an impromptu security area was set up in a corner of the security area. STRESSFUL

4. We had to take off our shoes, and they were swabbing them. I was told later this was to check for explosives, but at the time I thought they were checking for drugs. The night before I had been at a party where weed was being smoked and perhaps other stuff. I thought there could be some on my shoes. STRESSFUL

5. The rule goes, never smile in security checks, it only annoys them. Therefore, a bemused Issa standing next to me, asking about the potential of taking a photo to remember the event, was too much. AMUSING, turning to STRESSFUL

6. The flight to Mexico City – Uneventful, apart from the amazing in-flight magazine, which invited me to buy, amongst other things, wall sized cd stands, “the biggest map of the world in the world”, and this excellent product; http://images.skymall.com/images/products/a0/17/06/102211795x.jpg
Why, the number of times I have been flying to a foreign destination and thought “my I really would like a tree sculpture that would intimidate animals and young children,” and then, Bingo, someone develops a product for just such a niche. AMAZING

7. Mexico City – A pretty beautiful place to be honest. It reminds me of a nicer version of Los Angeles, in the sense that it has the same sort of feel of Los Angles (LA has a really noticeable Mexican population), yet also has A)Public spaces, including nice, large parks B)Lots of trees/plants C)A feasible public transport system. This is EXCELLENT, but also sort of sad, because it shows me all the things that LA could/should (?) be. (NB, I think, although it has taken about nine months, I’m finally making my peace with LA, and so I’m sort of wary about complaining about it. This could lead to inner fulfillment yes, but, unforchanatly for the reader, less exciting blog entries). EXCELLENT/SAD

8. As it happens, just days before going to Mexico City I went to Universal Studios and saw a ‘set’ of Mexico. As a result I got the set and real Mexico a little confused. Mexico looked a little bit like a film set therefore EXCELLENT

9. Mexican Pyramids. Pretty cool, however A)It was too hot B)They are largely made of concrete, which, I do not think was not the Aztec construction material of choice and C)They are totally dilapidated compared to their original glory. DISSAPOINTING

10. The Mexican subway. At first when I was In Ecuador, I was really wary of salespeople on the public transport system. However, very quickly I became really into it, a little bit like a live shopping channel. The Mexican subway had a number of these vendors; however the product of choice was cd’s. When they saw that there were ‘Americans’ on the train (as in us) some gravitated towards us. They played their music on sound systems to sample it to the train load of people. The speakers were evidently up loud so that they would fill the whole carriage. When the speakers were moved next to us however, the music became VERY LOUD INDEED. However, even this cannot detract from the joy of salespeople EXCELLENT.

11. Bus tours of Mexico city – EXCELLENT

12. Getting caught up in protests of national significance, complete with reporters carrying gas masks STRESSFUL

13. The food of Mexico City – Brilliant – I like spicy food a lot. My stomach does not however. Without too much emphasis, on the second day of Mexico, my stomach near imploded in protest. The next day, I would not eat spicy food. EXCELLENT leading to STRESSFUL

14. Walking round Mexico city in general EXCELLENT

15. Our bus to Acapulco – Essentially possibly the best bus I have ever been on in my life, and potentially perhaps the highlight of the whole trip. The bus had only 25 seats, only 3 seats a row, stretch back to almost horizontal, LEG RESTS, infinite leg room, and waitress service! As I cruised out of Mexico city on the First Class bus, I sipped my waitress served coke and contemplated the possibility of National Express adopting such a bus policy EXCELLENT

16. The stewardess of the bus, for whatever reason essentially hated me. I tried to smile at her a lot, but it did no good. The final straw came when I asked for a cup of tea with milk. I didn’t know it would be chamomile tea, and therefore served without milk. She was not impressed with my cultural ignorance, and looked visibly angered. EXCELLENT

17. Practicing my Spanish again “Es Possible” “Donde Esta la banos?” EXCELLENT

18. Never being understood when speaking Spanish. Ever. EXCELLENT

19. Acapulco hotel – Only 20 pounds/per person/per night all inclusive including alcohol. In theory AMAZING, in practice VARIABLE. This is for a number of reasons;

20. Insanely loud music by the pool; Maroon 5’s album has perforated my ear drums I swear

21. Ants crawling in the Salad – sort of UPSETTING

22. A really very bizarre room layout – I would suggest that, if one were to run a budget hotel, it would be a wise idea to avoid themed rooms. It was with sadness to learn therefore that this rule had been bypassed, and that the rooms had a bizarre ‘Roman’ theme. ODD

23. The bizarre theme was continued in the lobby/dining area with tiled images of Romans in full attire. Depicted was a Roman ready to go to war, which is fine, yet also a woman looking a little sinister, a little bit like a man, and also lifting her toga up in a worryingly provocative manner. This via the medium of tile art, combined with the underlying 70’s décor vibe was CONFUSING

24. My apparent ability to sit on the beach for hours and not get stressed that I should be doing something more pro active (in an attempt to avoid getting bored I bought about 6 issues of heat magazine, 4 issues of Oprah, one Newsweek, one random magazine, and one book to read on said beach) SUPRISING

25. Big waves – STRESSFUL

26. Missing the mass Spring Break transit by one week AMAZING

27. Ignorant American teenagers going into a convenience store, and speaking English at the shop keeper, who evidently didn’t speak a word of English, about paying in Dollars. ANNOYING

28. Whilst Acapulco was honestly amazing, at times I felt uncomfortable about everyone waiting on me. With the majority of spring breakers gone, there was far more supply than demand. Having lots of people trying to sell you stuff because you were the only people was a little bit sad, and disconcerting. There were people of an older generation just waiting to serve us; it didn’t always feel all that comfortable. The only way I guess I could get round it was by trying to be super nice to them. I attempted to justify it by saying to myself that I have worked rubbish jobs for years, but it didn’t quite wash…

29. There was one surreal night on the back of this where we went to a mega sized club, and found there to be only about 25 people in total inside. Essentially three of us (as well as three Americans), and fifteen Mexicans, all of about 17. It was oddly enough pretty fun, until we realized that the teenagers were copying our dance moves. To test this theory we threw in a ‘dummy’ move of waving our arms about in a distressed manner, and they all copied. Unforchanatly the joke was on me, because I felt guilty for misleading them, and so had to keep up the façade for about 3 minutes. EXCELLENT

30. The guy who served me my drinks (It was waiter service) looked exactly like the Ompa Looma from Charlie and the Chocolate factory (the new one) BIZARE

31. Going to the restrooms of a huge club, and being totally alone in them. It felt a little bit like a horror film, where everyone else had been killed, such as 28 days later BIZARE

32. Going into the ‘real’ Acapulco, and discovering real people. It’s pretty cool to know that, even in somewhere as touristy as Acapulco there is some real life and genuine stuff just below the surface. AMAZING

33. Watching cliff divers jump off cliffs (They are cliff divers, it’s what they do) BRILLIANT

34. Airport on the way back NIGHTMARE, mainly because the people who ferried us from the terminal to the plane had literally no idea where the plane was.

35. Because we were not allowed to bring fluids onto the plane I literally managed to drink 2 liters of water in 4 seconds because we didn’t want to waste money/water. My throat hurt I had opened it out so much. Due to late departure and messing around on the runway for about 40 minutes I was really very ready for the restroom by this point. I waited for takeoff, I waited for the seatbelt off sign, and I waited a bit longer, still no seatbelt off sign. The message then came over the tannoy that we had turbulence, and that no one was allowed to move, including the crew. Steffen who sat with me, when I told him my predicament practically barked at me to stay in my seat. I even pushed the call cabin button, which only resulted in voices over the tannoy saying that staff would only respond if there was an emergency. I needed restroom so badly by this point I was genuinely on the verge of tears. It was only when I was honestly considering urinating in the sick bag (I was, in fairness at this point offered a plastic bag by Issa) that my situation was understood. I was advised to bound for the restroom and hope for the best, even in the face of the severe turbulence. I told the cabin attendant what I was doing as I bounded past her. She told me I could go, but that it would be “at my own risk”. I held on to all the bars available in the restroom for fear of being flung onto the ceiling. It felt a little bit like snakes on a plane to be honest. Only without snakes… And a full bladder. But none the less equally dramatic.

Anyhow, I have been writing this blog for about 4 hours now, and I still have a shed load to talk about, so I’ll do that really soon.